Life as a dog momma

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With the constant cuddles, dog licks and Sunday walks.. who doesn’t love being a dog momma.

Firstly I can imagine that it’s a lot easier having a dog as a child than an actual human being. We don’t do any of that nappy changing or crying in the middle of the night kinda stuff. Instead we have barking, whining and nuggets of poo hanging from our dog’s bottom. The joys!

To celebrate national dog day yesterday; Here are the realities of life as a dog momma. If you are thinking about getting a dog, please read with care.

 

  1. You have to put their name in birthday and Christmas cards despite them not actually being able to read, write or hold a pen.
  2. You buy your other half a present from the dog including father’s day and birthday’s.
  3. Forget sex, your dog is the perfect contraception.
  4. The dog takes up more than half the bed, expect to wakeup on the edge.
  5. Forget cuddles with the boyfriend in bed, the dog will manage to creep in the middle.
  6. You monitor your dogs eating habits, to try and determine when they need to go outside for a poo.
  7. You will find little accidents in your house, sometimes hidden under tables.
  8. Talking of toilet training, it is the worst thing in the world.
  9. You will get stopped in the street by a stranger who will stroke your dog.
  10. You will get sick of always been asked “what breed” and “how old they are?”.
  11. You feel like a proud parent when people talk about dogs and you can show off your picture perfect snaps.
  12. How proud do you feel when they go to the toilet outside?- super proud.
  13. You buy the dog birthday and Christmas presents every year, because they are part of the family.
  14. You need a break away? just drop them off at their grandparents.
  15. You’re super over protective when a big dog walks up next to your baby.
  16. You end up having your toes licked constantly by the little gremlin.
  17. You catch yourself talking like an eight year old every time you look at her.
  18. You will find dog toys and dog bones dotted round the house, watch where you walk!
  19. Big dog walks are the best thing ever on a Sunday morning.
  20. You will never be alone, and will always have a friend for snuggles in the morning.

 

 

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